fears and worries

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A long time ago when I was a wee lad I liked to read the Guinness Book of World Records. It was fascinating what people could do, and fascinating what people would do to say they had a world record in something.

But in the midst of that book was a little blurb that has stayed with me for years and years: the hiccuping world record. Now I don’t know the exact amount of years involved but it was long. Like fifty years. I still remember some details. The guy starting hiccuping after slaughtering a pig in his early twenties and never stopped. Never stopped. He was in his late sixties in the volume I read. Probably still hiccuping unless death has given him ease.

I don’t hiccup very often, but because of that article there’s a curious anxiety that pops up whenever I do. I’m not neurotic at all, and I can’t say there’s anything equivalent on any other topic, but when I start hiccuping I get worried I’ll never stop. Which is why I’m right to the water, or holding my breath, or finding a wee fright. I don’t want to be a hiccuping retiree.

Think I’m weird? Maybe I am. But then read this story. It happens! People get stuck hiccuping and just can’t stop. FREAKS me out!!

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