I love New York in June, how about you…

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In my rambling netflix adventures I delved into a movie from the past, getting it almost for the sole reason that I remembered liking it a lot when it came out, even saw it a few times, but not remembering at all why.

Sometimes I get television shows, sometimes recently released blockbusters, sometimes art movies, or obscure movies, or movies that somehow I missed.

This time around I watched the Fisher King again.

It’s a good movie, to be sure. All the usual lofty movie language can be used describing the acting and directing and cinematography. But, there’s something under the surface for me, and I can’t quite put my finger on it.

I am convinced there are events and influences in life that if they happen to strike you at just the right time can be enormously powerful, yet exceedingly subtle, forces of change. Neurons go on different paths. Different choices are made. Thoughts lie beneath the conscious self tickling just enough without revealing themselves beyond a mere nagging instinct that makes one say, “no” to certain explicable things, and “yes” to the inexplicable.

For whatever reason this thought popped into my head tonight while watching this movie. Only I’ve never thought of this movie since seeing it last. So, I don’t know if it is one of those influences or if it only has the texture of one.

All throughout there was that inner tickling, as though there were thoughts it was provoking which don’t quite see the light of day but operate deep beneath. It’s interesting. I don’t know why. Do I identify with these particularly different characters in some way?

I also know that near the end my right eye got watery and my left eye let a few tears go.

Not many movies do that. I was seventeen or thereabouts when I last saw this movie. I don’t remember any tears then. Maybe the themes from this, and similar themes from other sources, took a long time sinking in. The purest tears are those which have been long distilled, especially when it comes to movies.

Interesting. I’ve intrigued myself, and that’s a fine basis for another go at self-analysis. What’s going on there under the surface?

And who is that red knight on the flaming horse that I saw earlier today?

Maybe when I get to 1 John tomorrow I’ll find a little more answers. I suspect I will, even if it’s still a wisdom I’m learning how to grasp.

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