Morning and Evening is closed for re-assessment
This page began with the intent to explore my soul through writing, examining each day for the wisdom it held. Recently, however, I feel like instead of moving along in this process, my writing has begun going in circles. It is not that I am no longer learning, indeed I am learning a great deal. However, I’ve realized much of my conversation is about assessing the lessons I’ve already learned, taking stock of my last five years and writing out the various strands of wisdom I’ve come across, or realized I need to come across. I was able to put into words the realities of the last many years, and so did so on a regular basis.
Now, there’s something different going on. I cannot define it very well, as it’s a process entirely different than before. It is a step up, requiring me to learn in each moment, and absorb the lessons. I read the ancient wisdom of mature Christians for insight and direction, understanding that, for now, I am unable to assess my present reality without some sort of interpretive experience to give insight and meaning. This leaves me more baffled than anything else, fluctuating, having reached the end of the roads I knew and now traveling down different paths, with different vistas.
It is more that what I am learning is more subtle and focused, leaving this page to be far too periodic as I am not able to daily discover the words for what is going on. This periodic quality then begins to take its own tone, revealing not so much the fullness of my inner being as those occasional times I decide to document some inner reality. I fear that while early on it was a fair picture of my soul, now it has become a distortion of sorts, and no longer focused on the purpose of describing the journey for what it is.
Instead of trying to post for the sake of more posts, continuing to go in the circles of consideration, I am putting aside this page for the time being, realizing that there may well be someday, even soon, in which writing in this forum will again be fruitful.
Turn, Turn, Turn.